I said farewell to my job and career on Friday... but not before I was offered an amazing opportunity to run my program and be the supervisor. Over 13,000 more a year. Shocking really. I was seriously considering it for a few days, but due to recent events... I think I will be turning it down. For those that have talked to me this weekend, you know of the "recent events" I speak of. Lets just say surprises rock!
So I begin my new "career" as a Stay at Home Mom. Its actually quite terrifying to know that I'm unemployed, but in a larger sense, I have the most important job, not to mention the most fun, stressful and exhausting job. LOL
Paul starts the academy tomorrow. I'm so excited for him and our family. I know its going to be a grueling 4 1/2 months, but in the end it will be totally worth it and so wonderful for our family. Such big changes are coming, but if I know anything at all, I know that Paul and I will be great, our kids will be great, and our family will thrive.
Sunday, July 29, 2007
Tuesday, July 24, 2007
4 days and counting
I'm officially unemployed as of July 27th. Let me state for the record, this is my choice. Paul has been accepted into the police academy and begins on July 30th. I put in my resignation last week. I can't believe I'm going from career orientated mommy to a stay at home mom. I guess I better break out the PJs and get a box of bon-bons. Just Kidding! I'm excited for this new chapter of our lives that is about to begin. I'm also scared out of my friggen mind. We are taking such a pay cut with me not working, it terrifies me. But in the end, if I was working and paying for daycare, I'd be bringing home like $500 a month, and in my opinion that is sooooo not nearly worth it. I couldn't even put the girls in a daycare center, I'd have to hire someone to come to the house and someone who can drive the girls around, Lily has therapy appointments, and preschool this fall.... finding someone like that would cost me nearly $500 a week..... SO NOT WORTH IT.
Not to mention, I want to raise my kids....
Paul and I have been extremely fortunate the past 3 years to be able to split our shifts so the girls haven't been in daycare, I'm not about to change that now. Sure money will be tight, but we will make it work, we always do.
Not to mention, I want to raise my kids....
Paul and I have been extremely fortunate the past 3 years to be able to split our shifts so the girls haven't been in daycare, I'm not about to change that now. Sure money will be tight, but we will make it work, we always do.
Thursday, July 19, 2007
Happy Birthday Julia Nicole!
Today is Miss Julia's birthday. Its soooo bittersweet. I'm so happy she has reached another milestone, but kinda sad that her first year is over.
I figured, I'd post up her birth story just to remember that special day!
Labor started around 5:50am on July 18th. Thats when I noticed a contraction. of course I had been getting these contractions for a few weeks, but they always went away. I was at work at the time and didn't think anything of it. I wrote the time down, in case more came and I needed to time them. Well I had a few on and off but nothing too painful or timeable. Around 8:30am I went to the bathroom and had some bloody show. Thats when I first thought this could actually be it. I left work around 9 and headed home. I knew that if this was false labor that taking a shower would get rid of the contractions.
I took a shower and didn't notice any contractions, since it was soooo hot out, Paul, Lily, my mom and I went to the mall to walk around. I figured if I was in labor walking would certainly help! I didn't notice any contractions at the mall either, so we came home for lunch. Around noon I started noticing some contractions and they were coming about 6-9 minutes apart. I sent Paul to work and put Lily down for her nap. I called my midwife around 2pm to see what she wanted me to do. She said I should come in and get checked, so off I went to the office. I drove myself up. While making the 45 minute drive, I noticed that the contractions were getting a bit stronger. At my midwife's office we did some monitoring. Contractions were about 4 minutes apart. I asked her to check me because at my last appt. the baby was posterior and I wanted to know if she had moved. I was 2cm dilated when she checked me and the baby was in the correct position. Margie (my midwife) said that this was definitely early labor but she wanted me to go home and wait till the contractions were around 5 minutes apart and bad where I couldn't speak through them. So home I went.
The contractions were definitely getting more uncomfortable during the car ride home so I called Paul and asked him to leave work around 5pm so that he could help me with Lily that evening. Once I got home, I did some last minute cleaning up around the house, called a few people to make sure someone would be able to watch Lily if we ended up at the hospital that night. We ordered a pizza for dinner (which I had absolutely no appetite for) and then played with Lily till she went to bed. I used my breast pump to help induce some more contractions, and boy did that work. I really think thats what helped my labor progress over the course of the evening.
We put Lily to bed around 7:30pm and Paul wanted me to call Margie to see if we should head up to the birth center. He was getting a bit nervous because it was an hour long drive to the birth center... and he just gets nervous over things like that. I on the other hand was convinced that I wouldn't be going till the morning. After speaking to Margie, she said that we should continue to hang out at home till the contractions were 3-5 minutes apart. She suggested drinking some juice and eating some crackers when she found out I hadn't eaten anything since 10:30am.
Around 9:15 I called Margie back because the contractions were getting closer together and a bit more uncomfortable.... so in we went to the birth center.
My mom and mother in law followed us up to the hospital and our friend Krista stayed with Lily. Once up at the birth center we immediately got a room and Margie checked me. I was 5cm dilated, but the baby was still pretty high. This was around 10:30pm. I labored around the room for the next few hours. I was in and out of the shower, on the birthing ball, and walking around. I couldn't stand being in bed, and was happiest when I was sitting on the birthing ball. Around 12:30am I told Paul that I wanted to get in the tub, so he went to go tell our nurse.
Margie wanted to check me before I got in, so around 1:30am she came to check me. After 3 hours of laboring on my own with no medicine or pain relief, I was hoping to have made some great progress. I was quite discouraged to hear that I was only 6cm now. Margie suggested breaking my water to help move things along. I was unsure about doing this since I wanted to go as natural as possible and didn't see this as being so natural. I decided to let her do it, since it had been 3 hours and I was getting tired.
Once she broke my water things definitely picked up in speed and intensity. I was in the tub by 1:40 and telling Paul that I didn't think I could do this, that this was so hard and I couldn't do it. He kept reassuring me and telling me that I could. My mother in law and my mom were there as well pouring cool water on me and reassuring me as well. They were all great. Within a few minutes of being in the tub I told my nurse I felt pressure so she went to get Margie. Margie wanted me to sit down to get checked but I was honestly most comfortable standing up in the water. I did sit down and Margie told me I was already 8cm. I asked her how long she thought it would be till I was fully dilated and could push. She said it would be about a half hour or so. I told her it would be about 15 minutes. I was right. I kept making everyone nervous though because I wouldn't sit down, I wanted to stand up. Margie kept calling me the dancer, since I just wanted to lean on the sides of the tub and rock my hips back and forth. I remember the nurse and Margie saying that they didn't think I would be able to have the baby in the tub since I wouldn't sit and I certainly couldn't deliver standing up and having the baby do a swan dive into the tub of water (the water only came up to my knees about)
Eventually I did sit back down and when Margie checked me around 2:10am I was completely dilated, which was a good thing because I started pushing right then and there. I pushed through 3 contractions and out she came! Julia Nicole was born at 2:20am. I was in shock.... I had pushed for 2 hours with Lily so the idea of pushing 3 times was a complete surprise.
We are home now and doing well. Julia Nicole was 7lbs 8oz and 20 inches long (over a pound more than Lily was!)
and of course some pictures....
I figured, I'd post up her birth story just to remember that special day!
Labor started around 5:50am on July 18th. Thats when I noticed a contraction. of course I had been getting these contractions for a few weeks, but they always went away. I was at work at the time and didn't think anything of it. I wrote the time down, in case more came and I needed to time them. Well I had a few on and off but nothing too painful or timeable. Around 8:30am I went to the bathroom and had some bloody show. Thats when I first thought this could actually be it. I left work around 9 and headed home. I knew that if this was false labor that taking a shower would get rid of the contractions.
I took a shower and didn't notice any contractions, since it was soooo hot out, Paul, Lily, my mom and I went to the mall to walk around. I figured if I was in labor walking would certainly help! I didn't notice any contractions at the mall either, so we came home for lunch. Around noon I started noticing some contractions and they were coming about 6-9 minutes apart. I sent Paul to work and put Lily down for her nap. I called my midwife around 2pm to see what she wanted me to do. She said I should come in and get checked, so off I went to the office. I drove myself up. While making the 45 minute drive, I noticed that the contractions were getting a bit stronger. At my midwife's office we did some monitoring. Contractions were about 4 minutes apart. I asked her to check me because at my last appt. the baby was posterior and I wanted to know if she had moved. I was 2cm dilated when she checked me and the baby was in the correct position. Margie (my midwife) said that this was definitely early labor but she wanted me to go home and wait till the contractions were around 5 minutes apart and bad where I couldn't speak through them. So home I went.
The contractions were definitely getting more uncomfortable during the car ride home so I called Paul and asked him to leave work around 5pm so that he could help me with Lily that evening. Once I got home, I did some last minute cleaning up around the house, called a few people to make sure someone would be able to watch Lily if we ended up at the hospital that night. We ordered a pizza for dinner (which I had absolutely no appetite for) and then played with Lily till she went to bed. I used my breast pump to help induce some more contractions, and boy did that work. I really think thats what helped my labor progress over the course of the evening.
We put Lily to bed around 7:30pm and Paul wanted me to call Margie to see if we should head up to the birth center. He was getting a bit nervous because it was an hour long drive to the birth center... and he just gets nervous over things like that. I on the other hand was convinced that I wouldn't be going till the morning. After speaking to Margie, she said that we should continue to hang out at home till the contractions were 3-5 minutes apart. She suggested drinking some juice and eating some crackers when she found out I hadn't eaten anything since 10:30am.
Around 9:15 I called Margie back because the contractions were getting closer together and a bit more uncomfortable.... so in we went to the birth center.
My mom and mother in law followed us up to the hospital and our friend Krista stayed with Lily. Once up at the birth center we immediately got a room and Margie checked me. I was 5cm dilated, but the baby was still pretty high. This was around 10:30pm. I labored around the room for the next few hours. I was in and out of the shower, on the birthing ball, and walking around. I couldn't stand being in bed, and was happiest when I was sitting on the birthing ball. Around 12:30am I told Paul that I wanted to get in the tub, so he went to go tell our nurse.
Margie wanted to check me before I got in, so around 1:30am she came to check me. After 3 hours of laboring on my own with no medicine or pain relief, I was hoping to have made some great progress. I was quite discouraged to hear that I was only 6cm now. Margie suggested breaking my water to help move things along. I was unsure about doing this since I wanted to go as natural as possible and didn't see this as being so natural. I decided to let her do it, since it had been 3 hours and I was getting tired.
Once she broke my water things definitely picked up in speed and intensity. I was in the tub by 1:40 and telling Paul that I didn't think I could do this, that this was so hard and I couldn't do it. He kept reassuring me and telling me that I could. My mother in law and my mom were there as well pouring cool water on me and reassuring me as well. They were all great. Within a few minutes of being in the tub I told my nurse I felt pressure so she went to get Margie. Margie wanted me to sit down to get checked but I was honestly most comfortable standing up in the water. I did sit down and Margie told me I was already 8cm. I asked her how long she thought it would be till I was fully dilated and could push. She said it would be about a half hour or so. I told her it would be about 15 minutes. I was right. I kept making everyone nervous though because I wouldn't sit down, I wanted to stand up. Margie kept calling me the dancer, since I just wanted to lean on the sides of the tub and rock my hips back and forth. I remember the nurse and Margie saying that they didn't think I would be able to have the baby in the tub since I wouldn't sit and I certainly couldn't deliver standing up and having the baby do a swan dive into the tub of water (the water only came up to my knees about)
Eventually I did sit back down and when Margie checked me around 2:10am I was completely dilated, which was a good thing because I started pushing right then and there. I pushed through 3 contractions and out she came! Julia Nicole was born at 2:20am. I was in shock.... I had pushed for 2 hours with Lily so the idea of pushing 3 times was a complete surprise.
We are home now and doing well. Julia Nicole was 7lbs 8oz and 20 inches long (over a pound more than Lily was!)
and of course some pictures....
Wednesday, July 18, 2007
Yesterday the girls had their physicals. My girls are completely healthy, which I already knew. Lily is 30lbs and 35 inches... Jules is 23lbs and 29 inches. My little peanuts.
We had a nice time at the birthday party and the wedding this weekend. Lily was the flower girl in the wedding, however she refused to walk down the aisle.... uggg the $120 dress up dress. I brought her home and she stayed with my parents for the night while Paul and I went to the reception. Jeff and Jenn had given us a hotel room at the hotel where the reception was, which was so nice. I really had a nice time. Saturday was spent getting ready for the birthday party. The party went really well. I LOVED having it at the Little Gym. It was so nice not to have to worry about anything, and the kids really seemed to enjoy it as well. We had a nice group of about 9 kids. After the party, people came back to our house to open gifts. I didn't really enjoy that part, I didn't have any intention of having people over to the house after the party.... but I guess that didn't matter.
So in other news....
I have given my two weeks notice at work. As of July 28th I will be a Stay at home mom. Paul starts the police academy on July 30th. The agency I work for was unable to come up with an offer to keep me to stay, so I'm going to be home with the girls! I just hope no one expects me to have a home cooked dinner on the table everynight. LOL
We had a nice time at the birthday party and the wedding this weekend. Lily was the flower girl in the wedding, however she refused to walk down the aisle.... uggg the $120 dress up dress. I brought her home and she stayed with my parents for the night while Paul and I went to the reception. Jeff and Jenn had given us a hotel room at the hotel where the reception was, which was so nice. I really had a nice time. Saturday was spent getting ready for the birthday party. The party went really well. I LOVED having it at the Little Gym. It was so nice not to have to worry about anything, and the kids really seemed to enjoy it as well. We had a nice group of about 9 kids. After the party, people came back to our house to open gifts. I didn't really enjoy that part, I didn't have any intention of having people over to the house after the party.... but I guess that didn't matter.
So in other news....
I have given my two weeks notice at work. As of July 28th I will be a Stay at home mom. Paul starts the police academy on July 30th. The agency I work for was unable to come up with an offer to keep me to stay, so I'm going to be home with the girls! I just hope no one expects me to have a home cooked dinner on the table everynight. LOL
Thursday, July 12, 2007
and so it begins
We have a busy weekend coming up. Today my parents arrive and will be staying till Sunday. Paul has lasik eye surgery this afternoon. Tomorrow he has a follow up, I have a hair appointment, Lily has speech therapy, and we have Jeff and Jenn's wedding in the afternoon. After the ceremony, I'll bring Lily back to my house (where my parents and Julia will be), and I'll meet Paul at the reception. Jeff and Jenn were incredibly generous and got us a room at the hotel where the reception is. Paul and I will spend the night and then head home on Saturday. Saturday afternoon, the girls have their birthday party. And Sunday, we will rest. Thank god. I'm going to be exhausted.
I can't believe its only been two weeks since my world has been turned upside down. I thought it would have gotten easier by now.... but if anything its just gotten harder. I'm worried that the girls' birthday party will be stressful because of everything going on, and it will be the first time everyone is all together since "it" happened. Ugggg.... so not looking forward to that. Hopefully everyone can be mature and not ruin my girls' party. I've been going between devestated and crying all the time to being an angry bitch. And everytime I smile, I'm faking it. I hope it passes in time, and one day soon we can get back to where we were... or even be better than what we were.
I can't believe its only been two weeks since my world has been turned upside down. I thought it would have gotten easier by now.... but if anything its just gotten harder. I'm worried that the girls' birthday party will be stressful because of everything going on, and it will be the first time everyone is all together since "it" happened. Ugggg.... so not looking forward to that. Hopefully everyone can be mature and not ruin my girls' party. I've been going between devestated and crying all the time to being an angry bitch. And everytime I smile, I'm faking it. I hope it passes in time, and one day soon we can get back to where we were... or even be better than what we were.
Monday, July 9, 2007
My baby turns 3 today! Ok, well she isn't my baby anymore, but she will always be my first baby. I can't believe she's 3.... the time has gone by way too fast. I do have to say that I do love the age she is at right now. She is filled with so much personality and light. She makes me smile every day and I am forever grateful to her for teaching me love and patience and how to be a good mom.
This weekend was filled with ups and downs. Such is life. On Saturday Lily went to her gym class. She had a great time, as usual. She did so well in the class by herself. I was so proud of her. We then went to a picnic which was long and tiring. Both girls was fussy and tired by the time we left. Luckily Lily passed out in the car, and after a bit of singing and coddling, Julia fell asleep as well. My father in law was driving, so we dropped Paul and I off, and took the sleeping girls back to his house where they spent the night. Paul and I had a night for ourselves, which was nice, and definitely needed. We went out to dinner, did some shopping then got some dessert. We were in bed by 10pm and didn't get out of bed till around 7:30-8am. The girls did great at my inlaws house too! I had written a note with some instructions about Julia (since they had never had her for an overnight). I guess my mother in law didn't like the note and was hurt by it. Ugggg, its not like I wrote the note to be mean or anything, I thought it would help. Oh well.
Yesterday Paul went to pick up the girls from my inlaws. Lily screamed from 11am when she got home, till she took a nap at 1:30, slept til 4, then screamed till after 6. We had Jeff and Jen's wedding rehearsal last night, and Lily was NOT a happy flower girl. She walked down the aisle with tears streaming down her face. I brought her home to my father in law, who took care of the girls while Paul and I went to the rehearsal dinner.
It was a tough day, for various reasons. I was filled with memories from our wedding, and with everything going on right now, it was hard. I'm an angry bitter person right now, and I hate it. But like everyone says, its going to take time and hard work to make some changes. I'm just so tired.
This weekend was filled with ups and downs. Such is life. On Saturday Lily went to her gym class. She had a great time, as usual. She did so well in the class by herself. I was so proud of her. We then went to a picnic which was long and tiring. Both girls was fussy and tired by the time we left. Luckily Lily passed out in the car, and after a bit of singing and coddling, Julia fell asleep as well. My father in law was driving, so we dropped Paul and I off, and took the sleeping girls back to his house where they spent the night. Paul and I had a night for ourselves, which was nice, and definitely needed. We went out to dinner, did some shopping then got some dessert. We were in bed by 10pm and didn't get out of bed till around 7:30-8am. The girls did great at my inlaws house too! I had written a note with some instructions about Julia (since they had never had her for an overnight). I guess my mother in law didn't like the note and was hurt by it. Ugggg, its not like I wrote the note to be mean or anything, I thought it would help. Oh well.
Yesterday Paul went to pick up the girls from my inlaws. Lily screamed from 11am when she got home, till she took a nap at 1:30, slept til 4, then screamed till after 6. We had Jeff and Jen's wedding rehearsal last night, and Lily was NOT a happy flower girl. She walked down the aisle with tears streaming down her face. I brought her home to my father in law, who took care of the girls while Paul and I went to the rehearsal dinner.
It was a tough day, for various reasons. I was filled with memories from our wedding, and with everything going on right now, it was hard. I'm an angry bitter person right now, and I hate it. But like everyone says, its going to take time and hard work to make some changes. I'm just so tired.
Saturday, July 7, 2007
Early Mornings
I love early mornings. I really do. Its something about the quietness of the house, before the girls wake up, or how quiet it is outside. I just enjoy them. I feel like its "my time". I woke up at 6 this morning. Jules was up around 6:45 or so. Its 7:30 now and Lily and Paul are still sleeping. I'm glad they are getting some extra rest, we have a busy day today.
Today Lily goes to gym class at 11am. Its going to be her first time going without me. She moved up a level, and now she goes into the class by herself. I hope she has a great time, but I'm nervous to see if she will end up going without me or not. I figure its really good practice for preschool this fall.
After gym class, Lily and I are meeting Paul, Julia and my father-in-law at the PD to go down to a WCPD picnic. We'll be shmoozing with all the right people. After the picnic, the plan is for the girls to go to my inlaws for an overnight, so Paul and I can have a night together. It will be my first time leaving Jules overnight, and I'm really worried. But I do trust my MIL, so I'll just have to bite the bullet.
Today Lily goes to gym class at 11am. Its going to be her first time going without me. She moved up a level, and now she goes into the class by herself. I hope she has a great time, but I'm nervous to see if she will end up going without me or not. I figure its really good practice for preschool this fall.
After gym class, Lily and I are meeting Paul, Julia and my father-in-law at the PD to go down to a WCPD picnic. We'll be shmoozing with all the right people. After the picnic, the plan is for the girls to go to my inlaws for an overnight, so Paul and I can have a night together. It will be my first time leaving Jules overnight, and I'm really worried. But I do trust my MIL, so I'll just have to bite the bullet.
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